Divorce your story: Marriage exit strategist on how your breakup can be a catalyst for personal growth

Divorcing Well

Leanne Townsend is the founding partner of Townsend Family Law. Each month, our team sends a newsletter full of helpful tips, advice and insights to help you navigate family law challenges.

Divorce may be a traumatic chapter of your story, but it’s not the whole book.

That’s the message Tonya Carter wants to share with women as they move forward following the end of a marriage or long-term relationship.

The marriage and relationship exit strategist recently joined Leanne Townsend on Divorcing Well to talk about how to live a fulfilling and intentional life, post-divorce.

“My goal is to get people to step into their personal power, reframe the experience and use it as a catalyst for growth.”

She admits that can be challenging, especially for those who have experienced abuse during their marriage, but says that divorcing your story of the past allows you to live fully in the present and design your best life — one that embodies freedom and fulfilment.

Don’t miss the episode for Tonya’s great advice on how to lead your best life and not let your negative feelings from your divorce keep you stuck.

Listen on AppleSpotify or wherever you download your favourite podcasts.

Court is not the only option — a guide to alternate dispute resolution paths for families

Going to court to resolve a family law dispute can take years and cost tens of thousands of dollars. In some cases, litigation is the only option, but couples are increasingly choosing to resolve their divorce via an alternate dispute resolution process.

In a recent blog, Townsend Family Law mediator Irina Kochkina explores alternative dispute paths such as mediation, arbitration and four-way settlement meetings, which provide a more collaborative approach to resolving marital disagreements.

Mediation, which involves a neutral third party who helps the couple reach a mutually agreeable resolution, is a popular and effective alternative to going to court, she writes.

“Mediation is especially beneficial in family law cases because it promotes better communication and helps to preserve important relationships, such as those between parents and children. It also tends to be less adversarial and more cost-effective than traditional litigation.”

Costly lesson: How one woman took control of her financial future after outsourcing the job to her ex

While delegating your financial affairs to your spouse can bring a degree of comfort in knowing your finances are being taken care of, it can also lead to unforeseen problems in the event of a breakup.

Maggie Smith learned that lesson the hard way after logging in to her family’s online bank account and discovering her husband drained half of their savings because “his lawyer has recommended it.”

In a recent essay for the New York Times titled “Never Rely on a Man’s Money,” Smith writes, “I had outsourced my financial security to him, someone I trusted — and in doing that, I had disadvantaged myself.”

Two years post-divorce, Smith says she’s become the CFO of her life by taking charge of her finances, even if the numbers aren’t always rosy.

“It’s empowering to pay my own bills and see where the money is going. It’s empowering to meet with my financial adviser, even if my outlook for retirement is grim. The stress of knowing is preferable to the stress of not knowing. At least if I have the information, I can act on my own behalf.”

Highlights from Divorce Explained

Every week, Leanne Townsend co-hosts an Instagram Live show with family lawyer Steve Benmor, where they discuss issues on the minds of those who are divorced or divorcing. Here are the topics from a couple of recent shows. Click on the photo to check out the full episode.

The role of access motions to resolve scheduling spats

When co-parents can’t agree on their children’s schedule for the holidays, they sometimes ask a judge to decide. In this episode, we discuss the crucial role of Christmas Access Motions.

Lawyers’ tips for better co-parenting during the holidays

The holidays can bring unique challenges for separated or divorced parents. In this episode, we share insights, tips, and advice on navigating the complexities of divorce during the festive season.

Join me on my health and fitness journey

Looking for more information?

Looking for more information on what to expect during a divorce, abusive relationships, love and money, life after divorce or other family law topics?

Check out the In the News and Blog sections of my website where there’s a wealth of great content to get you up to speed on everything you need to know.

Leanne Townsend, Family Lawyer

Partner, Brauti Thorning LLP
Brookfield Place161 Bay Street,
Suite 2900,
Toronto, ON M5J 2S1

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Leanne Townsend Lawyer and Divorce Coach
Leanne Townsend is a multifaceted entrepreneur and attorney experienced in the areas of family law and domestic violence. She provides a full range of family law legal services in addition to running workshops and other programs to support people as they go through divorce.

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