How to Know (for Sure) if It’s Time to Leave Your Spouse

Leanne Townsend is the founding partner of Townsend Family Law. Each month, our team sends out a newsletter full of helpful tips, advice and insights to help you navigate through family law and fertility law challenges.


Should you work on your marriage or is it time to get a divorce?

The decision to leave a marriage or long-term union is never easy — how do you know for sure? 

If you find yourself frequently confused about whether you should — or should not — get a divorce, there are steps you can take to break through the uncertainty and find clarity.

On a recent episode of Divorcing Well, I chatted with marriage coach Beth Miller, who says she has seen many couples repair the damage of their unhappy marriage — even when one partner has completely checked out emotionally. 

She says that by tapping into past relationships and inner childhood memories, it’s possible for people to release the beliefs that are keeping them stuck in relationship struggles.

If you are on the fence about leaving, you do not want to miss this episode.

Listen on Apple or Spotify.

Mom shares top tips for successful co-parenting: boundaries before flexibility

For couples with children, one of the toughest aspects of divorce is figuring out a co-parenting dynamic that will work for the children and adults alike.

Even if you and your ex are on the same page with respect to the fundamentals of parenting, the early days can be frustrating and challenging.

When Emma Singer and her husband separated more than a year ago, she says they both found the two-home set-up “heart-wrenching,” even though their children adapted well from the outset.

In a recent column, Singer says boundary-setting — and respect for those boundaries — was a game-changer for their family.

Cost of a cohabitation agreement a ‘steal’ given the value of assets at stake: finance expert

Moving in together is an important milestone for any couple — one you don’t really want to ruin with a discussion about “who gets what” should the cohabitation fail to work out.

But the reality is, if we’ve learned one thing from the influx of breakups and divorces following COVID, not every relationship is destined to last forever. And in this economy and housing market, breaking up can be incredibly expensive.

Not only is it nearly impossible for one partner to buy the other out of their home these days, but things like food, vehicle costs and cell phone bills are going to be more expensive when you live on your own too — so you’d be well-served to take as much money with you as possible.

If you leave it up to the courts, they’ll likely split everything 50/50, which isn’t fair if one member of the couple brought in more assets than the other. It can also take time (and cost more money) to sort things out in court.

That’s why Bridget Casey, a personal finance columnist for the Globe and Mail, suggests having that awkward conversation early — and maybe spending some money to have a lawyer draft a cohabitation agreement that will save you headaches down the road.

Highlights from Divorce Explained

Every week, Leanne Townsend co-hosts an Instagram Live show with family lawyer Steve Benmor, where we discuss issues on the minds of those who are divorced or divorcing. Here are the topics from a couple of recent shows. Click on the photo to check out the full episode.

Domestic violence and family law

Allegations of domestic abuse can have a substantial impact on the outcome of a family law case. In this episode, we share tips to help survivors bulletproof their allegations and explain what to do if you have been falsely accused.

How much will my divorce cost?

Calculating the financial cost of a divorce depends on several factors, but, in general, the more contentious the relationship, the higher the bill. Check out this episode to learn about our strategies for controlling legal costs.

Looking for more information?

Looking for more information on what to expect during a divorce, abusive relationships, love and money, life after divorce or other family law topics?

Check out the In the News and Blog sections of my website where there’s a wealth of great content to get you up to speed on everything you need to know.

Leanne Townsend, Family Lawyer

Partner, Brauti Thorning LLP
Brookfield Place161 Bay Street,
Suite 2900,
Toronto, ON M5J 2S1

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Leanne Townsend is a multifaceted entrepreneur and attorney experienced in the areas of family law and domestic violence. She provides a full range of family law legal services in addition to running workshops and other programs to support people as they go through divorce.

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